SAUNDARANANDA 13.22: Backward Steps towards Integrity

mokShasy' opaniShat saumya
vairaagyam iti gRhyataam
vairaagyasy' aapi saMvedaH
saMvido jNana-darshanam

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13.22
Let it be grasped, my friend,

That release is seated in indifference,

Indifference in conscious awareness,

And conscious awareness in knowing and seeing.

COMMENT:
MokSha expresses the goal of release, freedom, liberation, being set free.

As translations of vairyagam, what is the difference between, for example:
- freedom from redness,
- freedom from passion,
- dispassion,
- detachment,
- indifference?

In the end, who cares?

SaMveda, conscious awareness, is seated, as far as I understand it, in knowing and seeing what I wish to inhibit: a pattern of unconscious reaction to an idea.

But this knowing and seeing (jNana-darshana) is not the end of the story. We know in advance where this regression is leading: back to the practice of integrity (shiila). Integrity is the foundation on which rest such things as insight, conscious awareness, indifference and the ultimate aim of freeing oneself from the prison of habit.

"Who cares?" I asked, as I prepared this comment yesterday. And having slept on it, and sat, the answer is that I care. My heart wants to pour out the following:

A structure built on a foundation which lacks integrity is bound to collapse. This, I venture to predict, is the inevitable fate of Dogen Sangha. And when it comes crumbling down, I wish to be well away from the falling debris.

The Buddha's teaching thrives when a follower of the Buddha, on an individual basis, eschewing all -isms and political shenanigans, acts truthfully, with integrity. This is what today I would like to prove, starting afresh from here.

The Buddha's way is to act, as an individual, with integrity. I don't see any other way. A few years ago Gudo Nishijima wrote me an email outlining his intention to establish Dogen Sangha in the middle way between the Soto Sect and secular society. From where I sit, there is no such way.

In 1997, Gudo Nishijima betrayed me. Blinded by his conviction that the Shobogenzo translation was essentially his own "personal job," he could not see that he was betraying me. He did not know that he was betraying me. But in his action, he betrayed me. For ten years I argued with him back and forth by email, holding on to the optimistic belief that he would see the light and redeem himself. That optimism of mine was totally false, as optimism always is. Instead of redeeming himself, he just got older, and more and more mistrustful of the one who had always criticized him.

To count on the integrity of another was absolutely my mistake. My integrity is only a matter for me, as an individual. This, as I see it, is the teaching not only of the Buddha but also of FM Alexander. FM Alexander was a man of integrity. FM had his personal foibles, like betting on horses, but nobody, as far as I know, accused FM Alexander of lacking basic integrity. How could a movement founded by a man who lacked integrity be true?

In the womb, before our heads were filled with views on Buddhism, realism, humanism, theism, atheism, and the rest, all of us knew what integrity was. Learning the backward step of turning one's own light and shining has to do with allowing that kind of integrity to shine through again.

This translation is to lay the groundwork for that kind of individual practice of integrity. But more than that, I want this work to exemplify individual practice of integrity in the process of doing it, at this snail's pace of one verse per day.

"Who cares?" I asked, as I prepared this comment yesterday. And having slept on it, and sat, the answer is that I care. Seeing thus that my own foundations are not so stout, I am more convinced than ever of the need to start digging totally afresh, from here.

EH Johnston:
My friend, comprehend that salvation is based on freedom from passion, freedom from passion on right understanding, and right understanding on the apprehension of knowledge.

Linda Covill:
My dear friend, accept that dispassion is the secret of liberation, understanding of dispassion, and knowledge of understanding.

VOCABULARY:
mokShasya = genitive of mokSha: m. emancipation , liberation , release from ; falling off or down ; setting free , deliverance (of a prisoner); loosing , untying (hair)
upa-ni-√sad: to sit down near to ; to approach , set about
upaniShad: f. (according to some) the sitting down at the feet of another to listen to his words (and hence , secret knowledge given in this manner ; but according to native authorities upaniShad means " setting at rest ignorance by revealing the knowledge of the supreme spirit ") ; the mystery which underlies or rests underneath the external system of things ; esoteric doctrine , secret doctrine , mysterious or mystical meaning , words of mystery ; a class of philosophical writings (more than a hundred in number , attached to the brAhmaNas ; their aim is the exposition of the secret meaning of the veda , and they are regarded as the source of the vedAnta and sAMkhya philosophies)
saumya: voc. = " O gentle Sir! " " O good Sir! " " O excellent man! " as the proper mode of addressing a Brahman

vairaagyam (accusative): n. change or loss of colour , growing pale ; disgust , aversion , distaste for or loathing of ; freedom from all worldly desires , indifference to worldly objects and to life , asceticism
iti: " .... " ; that
gRhyataam = passive, imperative of grah: to grasp

vairaagyasya (genitive): dispassion
api: and, also
saMvedaH (nom.): m. perception , consciousness

saMvidaH = nom. of saMvida: having consciousness , conscious
jNana: n. knowing ; conscience
darshanam (accusative): ifc. seeing , looking at